Kissing is something that most couples do. Kissing well and with passion, however, is far less common. All too often, people fall into boring ruts and monotonous techniques that make kissing an undesirable prelude of more exciting activities to come. This is especially true for couples who have been together for awhile. To keep kissing fun or to rekindle the flame that was once there, observe the guidelines below. 1) What you do right before a kiss will set the mood. Gaze into their eyes and pay your sweetie a romantic compliment. 2) Hold your partner firmly, but gently in your arms. Put one arm around their back and put the other around the base of their head. 3) Occasionally, put both of your hands on your partner's cheeks to intensify the moment. 4) Kiss other places than the mouth. Add variety and intimacy by breaking away to kiss the cheek, forehead, neck, or anywhere else you feel is appropriate. 5) While maintaining a slow rhythm is essential to establishing intimacy, occasional bursts of intensified and quick movements (with tongue and hands) lasting several seconds will increase the passion. 6) Break the lip lock every few minutes to make a compliment about your partner's kissing ability, passion, or how sexy they are. 7) Location will determine the intimacy of the moment. Don Juan, himself, would have trouble creating a sensual moment in a busy school hallway with people walking by. Isolated areas are the best place to unleash your passion. 8) Use your hands to freely caress your partner's body. You can caress the hair, stroke their back, etc.
Friday, 30 September 2016
Tuesday, 27 September 2016
Online dating blunders the top 10 mistakes men make when contacting women online
: Here are the top ten things that you should avoid when contacting women online. This will be the most important online dating and relationship advice that you read all year. Mistake #1: Sending her 'just' a wink Most internet dating sites let you send "winks" or "show interest" for free. But what does this say to her about you? When that really hot girl gets your wink, she sees a guy that's not serious about wanting to contact her and too cheap to fork over the $20 membership fee. What a wonderful way to start off a relationship... Not! She also knows that a wink is an easy "cop-out". Anyone can scroll through hundreds of online profiles and wink at everything that moves. So, from her perspective, why should she spend time on you when there are dozens of guys taking the time to send her real messages every day? Mistake #2: Not having a recent QUALITY photo in your profile This one should be easy, but the fact is, most men do not upload their photo. The statistics on this one are very clear. Profiles with photos get 10 times more looks than those without; and profiles with QUALITY photos get 4 times more looks than profiles with poor photos. Let me ask you... When you log on to a dating site and search, don't you search for women with photos in their profile first? Why would she be any different? Many women will assume that you have something to hide if you won't post your photo – like maybe your wife... If you don't like your photo, have a professional one made. There are many professional photo services that do nothing but create great photos for your online dating profile. If you want to stand a chance against the other guys out there, upload a good quality photo. Oh, one more extremely important note – make sure that you upload a RECENT photo. Nothing is more disappointing than to meet someone and realize that the picture they sent you was 20 years and 40 pounds ago! Mistake #3: Sending a message with a boring subject Fact #1: Guys out number girls by at least two to one on most online dating sites and that's a conservative number. Fact #2: Good looking girls get dozens of winks and messages in any given day. You can have the most awesome profile and you can send her the most intriguing message, but she may never see it because you failed to capture her interest with the subject of your email. Give her a reason to open your message first! It has to stand out among all the others, or it has a high chance of getting deleted and never read. Spend just as much time crafting an intriguing subject line as you do in writing the rest of your message. Ask her a question or specifically reference some detail in her profile so that she will know you actually read it and are truly interested in more than just her looks. Mistake #4: Sending her a vague, generic or otherwise lame message So you took the effort to become a paying member of a dating site, and want to make the most of your membership. But then you came up with a standard boilerplate message, and you quickly copied and pasted it to dozens of girls. Go you! At least that's what you think... Ok, reality check. Women like to feel special and important. They can smell a lame form message a mile away, and the delete button is always close at hand. So, why not take a different approach? Actually read her entire profile (we know it's painful, but do it anyway!), learn everything you can about her, and then send her an insightful, personal message. Remember, you're messaging her and she needs to feel that she is the only girl in the entire world that you are interested in. Keep your messages fairly short and concisepliment or make reference to some thing or things you found interesting in her profile. Then, conclude each message with a "clear call to action". Always be friendly and polite, but tell her what you would like her to do next. Don't leave her wondering. An example is "talk to you soon" or "drop me a line". Mistake #5: Taking too long to respond to her message With all the buzz around the seduction and "pick up artist" community these days, many guys are afraid of scaring women away by appearing too eager or desperate. So they get her message and then wait... and wait... and wonder when it's "ok" to answer her. Let's clear this up. Responding promptly is not a bad thing. It will likely help you stand out from the other dozen guys that messaged her today. Like most opportunities in life, you're far better off striking while the iron's hot. Get over it and message her back. In fact, do it while she's still logged on. Forget the "head games" and be yourself. Women are attracted to confident men who are comfortable in their own skin. Be yourself and you'll be fine! Mistake #6: Asking for her personal information too soon So you messaged this really great looking girl, and she responded with a basic "Hi" message. Now what? You want her real email address, her phone number, her work number, or better yet her address so you can go there now, right? Stop! Asking her for ANY personal information in your first messages is a quick way to kill the relationship before it starts. Think of two dogs approaching each other... what do they do? They approach slowly and cautiously, and proceed to sniff each other. Why do they do this? They're getting to know each other. People are the same in many respects. Don't scare her off. Take it slow and let her get to know you before requesting personal information. Mistake #7: Making sexual innuendos in your first message Yes, she's really hot and yes her profile seems flirty and sexual... So you think it's OK to be overtly sexual when you try to contact her, WRONG! Unless you're on AdultFriendFinder or other adult site, sexual innuendos are unlikely to help you. They'll most likely torpedo any chances you might have had with her. So don't do it. Mistake #8: Sending her money or a credit card number Yes, the ever popular Nigerian (or whatever country is in on it this month) money scam. Social networking sites, including online dating sites, are plagued by scammers. And guys you know are falling for it every day... Remember, the whole "if it sounds too good to be true" idea still stands! If your online profile is really bad, and all of a sudden a girl strangely resembling a supermodel emails you and promises to make all your dreams come true, take it slow. And DO NOT send money or other financial information to make her come to you. Mistake #9: Checking out her "really hot" nude photos on her personal website The ever popular "cam girl" phenomenon is surprising scores of new men on a daily basis. So, what's a "cam girl?" Well, let's say you're searching profiles on
Wednesday, 14 September 2016
How to overcome your shyness with women
Don’t worry about. Many men are shy with women. Some don’t really get over it, but the good news is, most men do. Its just about self-confidence. Most men are shy because they fear rejection. Being rejected or turn away can be quite an embarrassing situation, but if you handle it right there’s nothing to it. This is a very normal reaction, but if you never take the risk, you risk losing the woman who might very well be the right one for you. Shyness shouldn’t hold you back. If you continue to be dominated with your shyness you will live a life that is lonely and depressed. It will interfere with the natural ability to coexist with the opposite sex, you will just be holding yourself back from enjoying their company. If you are shy with women, you will lose the ability to communicate well with them, you will be too preoccupied with their reaction and your actions, in other words, you’ll be uptight. Shyness is easily noticeable, women will perceive this as a sign of weakness, thus losing the chance to really get to know you better. You don’t want that. Here are some tips and guides on how to get over shyness with women. Build up your confidence. Do not be afraid of rejections. One good way in building confidence in getting over shyness with women is picking up or meeting women for others. When you do this, you eliminate the factor of the fear of being rejected. Since it is not for you, they may say no not because of you, but because of your friend. If you have mastered this, you may soon be picking or meeting up a girl for yourself. Casually open up yourself to everybody, not just to women. Learn to smile a lot more, smiling is much more contagious than the flu. But don’t be too over eager do it gradually. In time you’ll be open up to everybody, even the women. Don’t look at women as another being, treat her as a more refined guy friend. Be causal at firs, don’t look at her as a sexual object. Have a nice casual talk and things will just develop later on. If all your after is getting laid, women will see right through you. Be gentle with the women but don’t look a her as a goddess as well. If you act like the woman is too nice for you, you’ll never go anywhere. She will sense it and think as well. Do not expect anything. If you get into her face expecting so much, you’ll be in for a lot of disappointment. This is how jerks are classified. Being too confident is also a bane in the dating scene. Just go with the flow of everything and enjoy yourself. Do not be afraid of getting rejected. If you don’t take the risk you’ll never know if you could have had her as a great friend. The key in doing this is to stop taking things personally. Sometimes, there are people who don’t really mean what they say. You cannot be bothered if you don’t take it personally. Just don’t be too self-conscious, and soon enough you’ll get over your shyness with women. Getting over shyness with women is not an easy task, but not impossible. You will just have to learn to trust yourself, try to socialize more. Get out and explore. Everything starts and depends with you.
Friday, 9 September 2016
Do you know the pros and cons of adult online dating
Adult online dating services are a specialized niche in online dating, offering a number of similar features such as full searching capabilities and a large number of subscriberspletely anonymous and secure, adult online dating services feature erotic personals, where one can view sexy photos of other members. Simply register and immediately contact any member via instant messaging, plus you can search or apply filters that allow you to narrow down the members that suit your specific needs and desires. Many adult online dating services allow all members to add a profile to the site, chat, send instant messages, and browse through their huge database of profiles for free. Guests may enter the site and browse around, but in order to post a listing or use all of the site features you must register as a member. The benefits of adult online dating involve: • The ability for less sexually experienced or shy personalities to express and explore their sexual nature. • It is a safe secure environment to practice safe, virtual sex. • The ability to feel comfortable with the cybersex partner due to the anonymous nature of the Internet and adult chatrooms. Just as adult dating online has its set of advantages, there can be drawbacks to overindulgence. The dangers of adult dating services online, particularly pertaining to cybersex, involve: • Not knowing the person you are dealing with - the Internet cannot screen the age or sex of participants, potentially causing ethical concerns. • People can take online adult dating services too seriously and personally. Reports have been noted on cybersex addiction. • Internet adult dating could potentially ruin your physical sex life due to the lack of anonymity in the physical space. • It is not healthy to experience only online relationships as this will deter you from entering real physical relationships. If and when you are ready to use this medium, weigh the pros and cons of adult online dating to ensure that both you and other members have an enjoyable and positive experience.
Monday, 5 September 2016
The shady side of dating how to avoid the big trap dating advice for men
One of the most recurring mental blocks men face before they date is their eagerness to plunge into a deep, stable and unbreakable relationship. We must realize that men and women think, act and decide differently. Women thoroughly relish the long swelling waves of romancing that go up and down in their minds. They feel completely absorbed, engulfed and rejuvenated while going through the rigmarole of emotional upheavals. On the contrary, men like less drama, less of emotional splurge and more of stability, sailing in tranquility of a rock-steady relationship. What is the result of this mismatch of perspectives? You rush in and latch on to the woman of your life – as if there is no tomorrow – and the woman is viewing it totally differently. She visualizes pain before pleasure. Spends time thinking of what holds in future, thereby neglecting how she can hold on to the present. Exclusivity, monogamy – women yearn for that – but all at the pace which she sets. The course and speed of the game is decided by her. It is therefore important to appreciate that both men and women respond to different emotional clocks when it comes to developing a relationship; the sense of timing is mutually exclusive. The Big Trap is just this. You are in a hurry to grab, and eventually fall out of the race – for no fault of yours. Happening mostly to men who are a “One Woman Man” and who date infrequently, women also are frequent victims of the Big Trap, for they also wish to become a “One Man Woman” and are monogamous by nature. Yet men who are cool about meeting and dating many women – which I sincerely plead you to follow – hardly fall into the Big Trap. Your earnest desire is to bring an end to this tempestuous “affair” associated with dating and stabilize the relationship – none of the wildness of dating makes you happy – you want to go steady with a single woman. Reasons are aplenty for such behavior from men – seeking immediate but temporary monogamy. Definitely, a faulty understanding of women and wrong assumptions of their minds and beliefs is surely one of the main ones. One more reason why men want to move fast is their restlessness to delve into the “unknown”. They hate to be kept in the dark for too long. The eternal question: will she agree to sex, won’t she agree to sex, bores and irritates the man. And with every passing day, the curiosity increases. If only such men knew the pleasures of a single man, without any holdings, free of emotional baggage – they would never get so stagnated and close all doors to glorious opportunities, that lie hidden. So what happens when you are a victim of The Big Trap? You need to have a steady and stable relationship, as discussed above. As you carry on meeting women, your adrenalin rises to a peak, you get emotionally charged, yet with the lack of proper knowledge or understanding of the woman’s nature and expectations, you fall flat. You gradually start to lose ground. That affects your own sense of pride, self esteem. You start thinking romancing is a self-defeating exercise. This is where a vicious cycle sets in. The more you lose out on women, the more you start hating not only yourself, but women too. The Loser Boy visits you often in your thoughts and dreams. It becomes impossible for you to improve upon your attitudes and behavior because remember: failure breeds failure, exactly the way success does. The miserable feeling amongst single men, is inevitable. Or, perhaps you might date for a little while, find someone who doesn’t quite enthrall you, but you settle for the “second best” so to speak. Over a period of time, you start to realize, much to your disappointment, that you have settled for mediocrity – neither did you want this kind of woman, nor did you deserve her type. She, in turn gets more and more possessive – because she is also perhaps going through the same emotional drill as you are – settling for the “second best”. Physically may be together, but mentally, you are far, far apart. This kind of negativity overwhelms you and since the very nature of such emotional upheavals is cyclical, it gets repeated over and over again. By now you would have already developed a fixed mindset: “Want to Get out of this soonest” – this very attitude destroys you further. The more you hate the concept of dating and meeting women, you are trying to evade the very process designed to improve your expertise in the area and bring about mental stability. It is time you thought like: “So many women, so little time”, as the wider and broader you make your choices, the more your chances of meeting many, many women. Unless you broaden your horizon about women and dating, falling into the Big Trap will remain inevitable. Make women an “add on” to your otherwise glorious life, rather than the “end all and be all” of it. Don’t make her the reason for your existence – rather a small part of your existence. To ingratiate yourself with this kind of mental outlook is first, gather information (get empowered with knowledge), second, take the right decisions (act on the knowledge) and third, bask in the glory of your well-deserved success. Change the way you thought and acted till now, and be the man of your dreams, the man you always wanted to be. This article may be re-published with appropriate attribution to the author including name and website © Copyright.
Tuesday, 30 August 2016
Overcoming rejection
now that I am have swum a few laps in the online dating pool, I am cogitating another one of Karen's crackpot theories of life. it's about rejection. or not hitting it off. or not being compatible. or refusing to compromise. which could all be the same thing, more or less, depending on how you look at it. anyway, here's my theory: it seems to me that the intensity of the reaction a person has to a 'rejection' is inversely proportional to the trust they have in their concept of a higher power. stay with me one this one ... I think I can link it all up so it makes sense. let's say a person has little belief in anything more perceptive, orderly, or organized than himself. he does not pray or surrender or feel his connection to any type of creator/source/deeper order/life force. he relies only upon his thinking for guidance, and does not believe in any type of bigger picture than what he can perceive with his five senses. when a person with that consciousness thinks he has met his one and only, but she does not share his perception, then everything goes out of whack in his world. his life feels wrong, like it is departing from its path. he tries to reason with her, to convince her that she should stay, that she is making a mistake, because without her, his life seems empty. she may consider their plight to be a simple case of incompatibility in some important area, but he perceives a personal rejection, and feels as if there is something wrong with him that he needs to fix. I cannot imagine a more powerless and helpless position to be in than feeling like there is something wrong with you that will keep you from ever having what you want, and not knowing how or being able to force yourself to fix it. by contrast, let's look in on a person of faith, be it religious, spiritual, or contemplative/experiential. when she gets the memo that a new prospect does not feel the same kind of potential for a healthy and growing partnership that she does, her reaction happens on a different level. she may feel some grief or sadness, but she does not perceive his opinion as a statement of judgment about who she is. she does not go on a campaign to woo him back. she does not start a self-improvement campaign to fix all her flaws. she simply accepts that her time with him was brief, and her trust in a higher power allows her to relax, because she does not feel that she is at the wheel and took a wrong turn and had better get herself and him back on track. she trusts that the partner she is seeking will not require convincing. she surrenders to the bigger plan, knowing she may only have the capacity to see a step or two ahead of where she is, but never doubting that she will arrive at her destination. aware of the comforting and continuous presence of her inner guide, she does not feel alone, abandoned, or out of place. she lets go, and allows herself to experience her emotional response to the loss, and then moves on. so if I was going to give any advice to my fellow swimmers, it would be this: focus more of your energy on cultivating a relationship with a higher power bigger than your mind and senses, and less of your energy on finding your perfect match. then you can marvel in the graciousness of letting people come and go from your life, as they are wired to do, and you will feel the freedom to do the same. copyright 2006 karen alonge